I have moved, kinda. I'm still in the state of moving some of my stuff. I really don't like moving because I'm forced to look at the crap I own as material I don't need. It gives me the chance to see the things I hang on too and ask, why is this here, why did I buy it and why do I feel the need to keep it around. I have way too many books I have already read and projects I don't have the time to complete. I'm in North Scottdale now. The side of town that people of my income bracket really stick out with. Unable to have a kitty on our own, Athena and I decided to adopt. We have picked up a satanic little kitty that seemed so well mannered at the time I couldn't see the little squirrel for who he really was. At night he sounds like a racoon in the trash can's with the noises he makes. I don't know how I feel about declawing a ferrel cat like this. I have more open wounds than Acounta-Kente from roots right now and the prosect of raising this skin shredder in the home of two people that are either thin skinned or hemophiliac is becoming obvious. I'll post pics when I get home. Athena's friend got married the other day and I don't know who is having the most trouble adjusting to that fact. I'm really enjoying the move and all the peripheral benifits of living with someone I really enjoy, but it really highlights my low points making all the work of progress I thought I had made irrellevant. I believe that every person thinks they are right regardless and I'm open to the possibility I could be wrong on occation, but based on the mistakes i have made I'm seriously wondering how much of what I do I self justify because I know I'm right or if I'm actually wrong. All my job prospects didn't pan out, so I have to come from another angle. I was offered a shot at a job I don't know if I want on accident again. The pay is great, but the liability is too high to last. Back to the drawing board. I need a laboratory of schematics to figure out the basics of life. How can there be so many books covering what should come so natural from the 1000's of years of evolution. Lifes variables are becoming increasingly differential. I'll post more when I get home so I can access my plethora of pictures because as much as I write, I couldn't possibly articulate in such a limited format how happy I am. Not only are Athena and I going out officially, we are doing well. We are very complementary and the things we have in common often are the topic of conversation. The only thing I have to work on is the things that I have. She is a wonderful woman and I feel very lucky to have the time to share with her.

I tend to live my life in one of two ways, function or non-function. I could be content with only a small amount of money, cable TV and a case of beer a day. I could make due...for a while. Then in the absence of everything the nothingness would cause me grief. I would find pleasure in anything that would keep me busy. Even my off days are usually very busy. At times I find myself on the far spectrum of function. Every minute of the day seems valuable as I try to allot the tasks of the day the proper amount of time. I seem happiest at a level that causes me some serious sleep derivation. Life rolls by like a fog and I operate in some sort of third party autonomic way. I could try to describe it but Martin Scorsese's "Bringing out the dead" (1999) does a very good job at setting the tone for the life I'm describing. The mood is a bit somber, but it did win two academy awards. What I'm talking about is the extreme tax placed on Nick Cage's character Frank Pierce. Desperately needing sleep, but with sleep comes nightmares and the knowledge that someone, somewhere is dying. One of my favorite lines is
"Oh, I see. With all the poor people of this city who wanted only to live and were viciously murdered, you have the nerve to sit here, wanting to die, and not go through with it? You make me sick! "
Life has been moving at a very fast pace and keeping up has been difficult, but I remember sitting at home and drinking beer all day and watching all the racing I could handle, giving me way too much time to think about things. Postulating on the same thing can only lead to an indefinite number of possibilities, most of which can be elected or discarded easily without affecting the outcome and in the end all you would have are thoughts. I think I remember something from the Socrates, Plato dialogues that I derived this from. A life of thinking would be only a beginning. So I choose to spend a little time thinking and as much time doing as possible. Life as I'm living it exists in the cracks of time of the things I feel obliged to do for the things I want to do. I'm moving in 2 weeks and will post pics of the place, before we move in so you can see what it looks like if we were just squatting in an abandoned North Scottsdale 2 bdrm apartment. I have seen the inside of my own dwelling less than 6 times this month, so technically the moving in part will mostly just be a convenience item where I don't have to disturb someone from their sleep so I can take a shower and rack out to go right back to work down the road. While school was in it was a major time saver and 4 miles for work isn't enough to even turn the key in the ignition at $3/gal. Athena and I are doing quite nicely, we are going out, which is an ironic term given the situation. We never get to go out anymore. She has been extremely supportive of my heavy work schedule, which leads me to believe that my abrasive personality has finely paid off. Thank you Chucky Cheese Janitor for being an inspiration, you were right all along. Seriously, I feel like my life has finally found some quality. I really don't know how to put it. We both feel strong premature feelings for each other and quitly suffer. There is no rush to name it, there is no description that could match it. It just is a very nice homginization of two self destructive individuals. It's like watching the ball drop on times square, you know there's going to be fireworks. (I've always liked fireworks, its the term novelty explosives that its associated with that I think is an irony, oh and there pretty)

I would share my complete details of grading, but for now you can settle for this. I passed. Anatomy and Physiology 202 was a lot of fun and I enjoyed it, but I did not want to take it again for the third time. Working two jobs and going to school puts school at the wrong end of my priority list so I'm changing jobs to one that is on track, that interview is tomorrow after my second 16 hour shift in a row, only to return to another. I'll take this pass, but I wont stop studying until next class which might not be until Spring 2008. I will leave it to this. The minimum grade to pass is a C, at 750 pts possible 75% is 525 pts minimum, I have copied and pasted directly from my grades my final grade in the class and I think you may find it interesting based on how important this is to me, how I did. I have a lot of self study to complete and I'm keeping everything I got from course documents on my hard drive. Like this intersting picture of histology.(the study of tissues) here is a very close look at what makes the world spin.

Total 526 /750 , one mesely little point. ONE. one point from faliure is some measure of success. I guess.
Things in every aspect of my life are moving along quite smoothly considering. I have a girl friend. I'm not single anymore. That is a big step. We have so much in common, yet find the differences on occasion. I find the rifts riveting making me more aware of things I did not know and look forward to learning more about. Thats what this is all about right, learning. My only regret now is that I am on a path that keeps me away for much of the time we could spend together in this newly forming crossroads. She supports me so much even though I can not do the same for her right now. She shows me on a regular basis that I mean something to her and she is equally interested in spending time with me and seeing where this goes. Where it's going is actually a little frightening considering the thought that she seems to be someone that I could never tire of spending more time with. She is of course, Athena and as soon as I get some new pics I will post them, we are both very busy putting together our own agendas, spending great lenths of time from each other on individual aspects of our lives. The running line is uncomfortably comfortable. Both of us constantly second guessing the nature of things based on our experiences. I don't like it when anyone touches me or talks to me for an extended period of time, I need my space to reset and ramp up, some sort of personality refractory period. When I'm with her it feels like its me time and I enjoy every bit of it. I'm very tired, I'm reminded that when someone experiences long periods of sleep deporvation at about the 72 hour mark the same hallucogenic effect of LSD can be experienced. I'm looking forward to Thursday for two reasons now. Athena and any other visions that come into view.

This is Athena and Me half smashed and finding the finer points of my digital camera. So there is this feature that will take the picture a specific amount of time after you push the button. Time is a fickle enemy of a inebriated person so here we are staring down the scope of technology and surprised to find our eyes open. The drink till your chinese pictures will not be uploaded unfortunately, but they are quit funny. To those that have heard enough of her, this is her to those that have not, too bad for you.

I finally got the windows tinted on the truck, DARK. It is really dark. I like it. You can't see anything, yes it's illegal, but in some sense that would only be appropriate for me. This horse shit really stood out on the hike so I took some liberties.

I gather knowledge from many sources, but a crown royal commercial was not meant to be so inspiring. You know the one where they slowly pour to booze over the glossy cubes of frosty in a deep round glass and speak smoothly over the sound of the liquid libation trickling and the loop reverses as the liquid defies gravity and heads up towards an unseen force. The voice over is symbolic for me. Quality, not quantity is the key that got stroked in me. Life is so very short that each day passes too quickly to do all the things needed as each day end, lists are left with a hefty tab. As we lay in bed at night and the sun light long gone from our windows stains our memories with the days unfinished business I can only hope that quality bleeds through those strained neurons in our grey matter. So if you have trouble at rest it should be the ambition that keeps the sleep away and not the mistakes we have made. Those lessons can be applied towards each days new beginning. As each day the sun will rise, a new chance to accomplish our goals is given and it is this I apply in my life. I want to do something each day to get what I want out of life, even if it is a small step. Some use lists, some our memory. The thought of the work to be done rather than the reward received is the only thing to clog our sight to the finish line will be the next step in this marathon of living this life, this day, because this night is approaching fast and will swallow this chance and be forever left another memory. Raise your glass to quality and savor the favor of that memory.

Lifes little details leave an infinite amount of room for indecision. I'm buckling in for Finals coming up the first week of May. I havn't had one call back from the 5 jobs I put in for at the hospital and should put in at my old security company for extra hours until something else comes up. I'm finally tinting the windows on the truck and hope to get the rest of the little things sorted out with that project before to long, leveling kit and one more amp should leave little room to improve for a while. I'm jamming out better than ever with 5k of songs on my ipod at instant access-THANKS DJ! I'll take some pics this weekend of any adventure that insues and maybe finally pick up the fizzer, so ya'll can see it's current condition. The Harley is still in jail and will be there for atleast a little while longer. This is the beginning of my first 16 hour day in a while and the sun is already unbearably bright. I'm nocturnal as any of you who have been privy to my phone conversations have noticed. Anatomy and Physiology is amazing and yet the only difficulty is putting all that information in my grey matter. The principals of physics are universal and the similarities I tie to auto and motorcycle mechanics are a daily observation. I think I understand things a little more clearly, but I'm not ignorant enough to truly believe I know how things work yet. There are numerous systems in the human body that fuction daily autonomicly that are mind numbing. It's little miracles serve as a definition of the value of every human life form on this ball of dirt. If everyone knew what goes on inside of their body everyday, they might cherish life a little more and squeeze more life into every minute of the day that goes by wasted. Quality however is not proportionate. Good luck on your search for Quality and not it's definition, that would be inconsequential. see Robert Persing's book "Zen and the art of Motorcycle mechanics" -Evan

I went on a real date on Saturday. I think we were both jonesing for some attention, becuase it went from a date on saturday to long phone calls, texts and lunch on friday, heading to a bar friday night and carshow/bowling combo on saturday night. I won't go into details except to say she is smart, funny and independent. I'm looking forward to spending more time with her and seeing where this is going. For now, it's great to hang around someone and just be myself without appologizing. I'll try to post a pic as soon as she let's me snap off some. Russ called me and we almost met up at the carshow, I'll catch him next week or so. Huff is coming into town to catch a game. I'm going to be busy for a while.

Here I am with she devil at the tilted kilt for the Daytona 200, I had never seen a tire change on a motorcycle before in a set race, I didn't even see how they did the chain adjustment it only took 22 seconds. the next one is of the new bike. Watch it's going to be awesome. I work with 5 MMI students, do you think I'm going to have a problem fixing this thing. Seriously at least 2 of the guys on staff have completed their training and still work in security. A&P is proving to be a formidable enemy not due to difficulty, it is simple memory, but the time. I have a exam on Thursday and will publish my scores regardless. I have to thank DJ for the time and energy he is putting into my system and wrapping my ears with the sweet noise that is music, Paula for sending me a pic of her new truck(brother approved), Eva for snapping pics of the events I miss and Mona for keeping me up to date on your life so I don't worry. I'll let everyone know how my date goes on Saturday and maybe snap a few pics, We are going to the car show and bowling, both in Scottsdale. I'll give more details if they become imperative, but she would be the first candidate I have dated for a while. -Evan

I guess I'll make this a fairly upbeat addition to the list of dark entrys. Everything is happening so fast daily information would look to subltle. I am not working 80 hours a week any more so I have way to much spare time. I have yet to find a free outlet to said time, but enjoy 8-10 hours of sleep per day vs. the previous. I have picked up a new bike and will upload pictures as it progresses. I got my FZR 600 back from the guy who bought it for a lack of payment, but havn't had the time to give it any needed attention. It's bike week in Phoenix and the air is thick with two wheel activity. There is a party everyday that seems bigger than the last. This weekend there is awsome drag races at both Speedworld and Firebird. The all pontiac races held at speedworld every year by Steve Barcak. It is the passion of this individuals personal creed of true pure pontiac power that bleeds into the event. I have been to many drag races and this is easily my favorite. The atmosphere is like a family barbeque with old freinds in the mix at an abandonded yogi bera camp ground with a 50's style diner like drag strip in the back. Cars are the stars, but the people that bring this event together and see it through don't make light of the fact that is a person first event. On sunday they open the stakes to include all muscle cars. People that come far away take their Pontiacs out to battle all comers of any make or model muscle for a wild west dual, until there is one. It's like stepping back in time 20 or 30 years to see old tin scoot down the track. Also there is a number of bike shows at pretty much every venue in town. Most notably Westworld off the 101 and Frank Loyd Wright, where Willie G. Davidson himself will recieve a life time award on Saturday. That's about 2 miles from where I'm sitting, but I'll be at the AHDRA races on Sunday for sure. Seeing all Harley Davidson powered drag bikes test the clock on the sticky tarmac of Firebird raceway.(I hope they prep for this event) The fastest harleys are in town and everyone that even holds a key is gingiling it off the ignition this weekend. Last year I met Paul Yaffe of Paul Yaffe Originals when he threw one heck of shin dig at his shop. Normally, and I have been there before, the shop is completely off limits, but for one day all the doors and gates are opened. Bikes currently in the build process or currently being built during are roped off, but you can still cut to the can right through the shop all these amazing machines are built in. Mr. Yaffe was really cool even though I was dressed in racing leathers, an obvious difference than the regular customer, with my X-11 hanging off a d ring of my back pack. We talked for a few minutes about the modications he was making to his 32 tudor sedan, no one else seemed to notice the hot rod at all. When I got a good look at his bikes I could see why. Unbelievable in both conception and execution. See his web sight. I hope to learn more about air cooled v twins this weekend, but I don't think I will be changed from my original view. Bikes are for riding, pure and simple. Chrome, paint and anything to powerful to be reliable is not my fancy. Riding should not be a side note and bike ownership, does not impress me. I swung by Black Magic Motorcycles in Mesa,AZ and was blown away by both the owner and the bikes. He spent hours with me and seemed at times caught up in the mechanics and delivery of lots of reliable horsepower. What impressed me most is he didn't even flinch when I mentioned my 883 sportster, his daily driver for all the absolutly sick bikes he builds is a sporster with 200k miles on the bottom end and a wideglide conversion. He walked me back to the machine shop section of the shop and showed me the case modifications to build a 88 cubic inch sporty motor that would tople any concept of the sportster being anything but what it was originaly intended. FAST AS HELL! I enjoy the thrill of a sports bike, but the sportster can get me further, for less and that has always been my mantra. I'm cheap and I like to go fast. Hope you all have some passion this weekend.

I sit in the darkness below the floating beams of light of the projector to the screen. In the absence I try to see what is not there against the plaster flecked cieling. I know that the lens has a powerful light behind a liquid crystal display changing the color of each specific pixel, but I am hindered by the humans eye and the brains ability to decipher only 16 frames per second, quite a bit shy of the speed of light might I say. I count the bottle caps on the table to preoccupy my mind so I don't fall asleep. 7 bottle caps, more than last night when I drank one beer and fell asleep on the couch with my contacts in. I wonder if the thoughts that creep in happen only because new thoughts arent being installed. I need new thoughts and I start school again soon. Thank the god of those that choose him, I am going crazy with insane thoughts. Women, horsepower and philosophy all that can not be defined, cornered or judged. to award one merit is only to imply indifference to another and that in itself an insane proclimation only to be rediscoverd...I must sleep as my sausage fingers fail against the keyboard and every letter typed is simply recovered by the backspace key and replaced by another..ehhh ahh ugh blah blah. stop reading this it's embarassing for you to witness my drunken yet perfectly scrawled ranting.

I really need to update this more often. I got a promotion and a raise at work so I could quit my other job. Now I work eighty hours a week at one job. The new truck just recieved a bitchin sound system. I got some of the best stuff Pioneer makes and some MB Quartz component speakers for the doors. Stereo shop guys are almost as morally bankrupt as car sales men and crack addicts. It seems that anytime someguy wants to invade my private space and put his arm around me and call me buddy he's just looking to stick it to someone. I go to one place and the guy says this brand and model rock and the model numbers don't mean quality it is what you pay pretty much. exerpt...well you have the $200 model and those are ok, but they sound like crap compared to these $600 ones. (seriously I'm replacing AC delco paper cone woofers, I know what sounds like crap and I don't think I could tell the difference between component speakers unless I was outside with the windows up) I got all my stuff on e-bay and sourced through friends and Dec. 30th my buddy Aaron and I stayed up till 3.30am freezing our asses off and we only mounted one subwoofer in the custom box that we didn't cover as it needs some modification for final fitment. my seat is locked in the bus driver position, but it vibrates like crazy. I told mo about the first headache i got that wasn't alchol related and when pressed why I didn't just turn down the volume I had to admit it was a great back massage. (even with the bass up and treble down those mb quarts titanium tweeters hit tones only dogs can hear)
The system was a bad idea finacially as it has turned my lump of cash back into paycheck to paycheck and school starts on the 17th so I wont be turning in the overtime i had been. I am down to a 4 day work week with 2 12's and 2 8's scattered through the week to make it impossible to plan anything. I also bought another engine I am piecing together for..something. I only have 6000 miles on my truck, but I got spanked going up the on ramp today by a front wheel drive cadillac from the '90s. I picked up a gen III 4.8 L for $150 minus w/p and harmonic balancer, and two holes in the pistons. thank god for e-bay. pistons w/ rods for 5.3L $60, crank to make it work $140, computer to fire the mix $90. I'm going to be out the door under a grand at this rate and have one of the most powerful trucks in the neigborhood. I got the goods I need to button this puppy up on e-bay right now, but I'm not done researching this enought to touch a bolt yet. I bought the wrong computer, chevy has the wiring harness plug in's color coded and I got the wrong one, I will need to reflash it anyway so it will be a while. I'll keep buying as money and prices allow till I have a smoker on the patio. It is so awsome to have all this racing technology trickle down the the humble production truck engine. Aluminum heads, roller rocker and lifters, cross bolted mains, long tube intake runners on a raised plenum pholnic intake with a 80mm fly by wire throttle body, coil on plug ignition(DIS). I really don't care what this goes in, its going to be mean. Until more parts come in and there are 30 hours a day, consider this project shelfed, I do have 94K left on my warrenty.

The reality of all things realized at any point can only be terrifying. The net effect of the smallest modification can hurt or help actual people. Tradgedy and attrocity is avoided by the same action that presents when it is necessary. War for example. I would never condone any war, but I would not lie down for anyone either. Die with grace, like a monk who lights his gasoline soaked cloak and dies while meditating on the message he is sending to the world in a true baptizm of fire. What a profound statement weighted on such a weak society as ours couldn't possibly carry the same message as the one I believe we are hearing. ...we've traced the call...the call is coming from inside the house!- line from a horror movie meant to inspire terror still rings as true as the taco bell in head of my belly. If we want to fight terrorism, wouldn't it be as simple as not being terrified. What are we so afraid of. A school ground bully terrorizes other children to get something, what are we giving up. What freedoms have been comprimised to terrorism that we didn't give up to the government before the war started.

I search craigslist.org, backpage.com and ebay constantly like some sort of drug induced need. The only thing more dangerous than the crap I can not afford is the crap I can. I wander the junkyards of Phoenix looking for the next dilapidated tresure only to stumble upon it and on to its successor. It is a painful game of chance that I imagine happens at any pound or even orphanage, the risk of getting people need to see saved or finding the reason people don't. Bet with the house on this one, that current sociological trends will show that even with reason twisting the wrist of the common consumer not many are jumping ship to own an alternative vehicle. I say buy that Karmen Ghia you drove in college back and spend a weekend in the back yard with a six pack and some freinds pumping new life into what was an old freind. Who knows maybe your killer tiller on wheels will motivate some young kid to stay true to what drives you. Anyone can order a ready made vehicle that is safe and dependable and it is just a car. When you work on that car, I mean put your own time and effort into it, a part of you stays with that car. Go buy a Ford Mustang and that's what you'll have. Buy a 67 fastback and rebuild it and it will be your car, what you did and how you did it. I seem at times to be a rational human being with logic and reason, but I still pet the dash board and talk to the istrument panel while I turn the ignition in frustration pleading the vehicle to start. I incourage anyone of megar means to find a new solution to the commuting conundrum. Buy a project car and learn as much about it as you can, maintain it like a relationship and it will never fail you. If you live close enough to work, for the love of everything holy walk, bike or ride a bus. No vehicle is cheaper than free transportation and after any car a 1200 dollar bike looks cheap after you factor gas and insurance. -Evan
Take a good long look at the guy you paid to fix your car, forget the bullshit words and any explaination, human nature seems to bleed out of any profession. Why is it that someone can accel in school and lose the useful tool of common since.

I feel like I can redefine burn out. I don't feel like staying home from my job, since I don't work for a living I get paid enough simply to exist., if I was complaining about my job I would be insulting the hard working people that do complicated tasks for a living including but not limited to standing or moving objects of any fasion. I am speaking of the metaphorical, "spinning my wheels". I swear the last few months have wet the road I'm on and I just sink. I don't think the means meets the ends in this paradox. The solution is ironically simple. Rather than work overtime again so I could get that new LCD, I have decided to simply be that elated the next time I see my left foot while walking. I survive this bliss, while others suffer the consequences of lustfully wanting the things they do not need. To those that know me this is a hypocritical script. -Evan

I have found a way around the ticket and will be contesting the fine, stay tuned for more. In the intrest of reducing the chance of a repeat I have parked the bike and I am driving my licenced legal and finally past emmisions truck. I put a new copper/brass radiator in it and it still overheats at speed. I will replace the fan clutch today as the thermostat and water pump are brand new, less than a week old. I also installed a $80 deck, it's all I need and plenty loud when the good songs are on. I finally pushed the anemic brick up to eighty a previously unseen speed. The sickness hasn't hit with this horse yet, it's just a good running truck and I plan to keep it that way. I have to say that my choice of transportation would mostly be constantly wrong, I seem to be attracted to the things that I sting. Rusted metal and blown motors be damned, the hot rod benieth will breath again while my wallet bleeds profussly. I think I'll change my alias to Hemoevelknievelphiliac or HEKP to my freinds. I have too much free time on my hands for a guy that works this many hours. It's kinda nice to drive a cage again. I got to drink a fountain drink with out drama and listen to the radio while I was in full recline (think coach, it's a truck).
I think I'll be moving soon and suddenly the hot rod really is a problem. Later

I just got a ticket driving to work. 55 in a construction zone in Scottsdale, technically criminal speeding considering a mandated 25 mph speed limit. I'm fighting it, I was robbed.(ignorance really is blissful) I wonder if constantly questioning authority is the breeding ground of rougely wrong thoughts. Regardless of age, we are all children and phychologically speaking respond the same way. When approched about foul behavior the first emotion is strong defiance, a seperation between self and wrong doing and even self imposed justification. This form of reason seems to serve me well, even though it has not neted much but trouble. My philosophy of suffering rather than hand my soul to the mouth of evil is visible to myself alone. Call me crazy, I'm sure many people have had similar opinions of men we now see as great. I might not be remembered post humously as someone great, but my visions are. Moses said he saw god, now he is a prophet. MLK saw the freedom of oppression, now not just a road but a holiday. I see a democratic country of choice and a government organized to guide it's citizens and not be guided by corprations and lobbiests in washington. Sure the tipping point isn't a 177 dollar ticket or even more, but I wish I could put into words my true feelings for the nation in pride and pity without offending both parties.(pro and con, not Rep. and Dem.) You can love cookies, but at some point you have to throw them out and make new ones. I want a fresh govenment with out the bloody civil war, I hope the next rigged electorial college election is a successful departure from the past. CNN's story on the possibility of Pres. Bush being an idiot was a good start, although it did end on the obligatory possitive side after presenting much to the contrary. Fight the party and the power, not the people. I think the problem could be the unity. One nation under god, is like a precurser to faliure. That would be great if everyone could agree on one way of life, whose ignorant ass thought that one up has sure got my view skewed. later preprogramed people. -Evan

Sunday night was a blissful one. I had been looking forward to going to Lost Dutchman State Park to watch a night time movie showing of Raising Arizona. Hollywood called and we decided to roll out on the bikes together. Wise in his infinite wisdom, because we sat on the bikes rather than the ground. He forgot his wallet and was out of fuel so he offered to let me drive his '06 GSX-R 750 (Suzuki) if I put gas in it. I filled both bikes for under $10 bucks. I once heard an aggresive salesman refer to the sound of a $220,00 Ferrari F550 maranello as "pure sex", it should be noted here that vehicles speed is 180 mph. If there is a $12,000 derivetive of the F550 it would be the stock lowmount exhuast new for the '06 model GSX-R, reminesent of Moto GP bikes and a throw back to Eric Buell, who has been doing it on his bikes since the early '90s. I have never imagined a machine could sound so beautiful at full song. A true instrument in every fashion, I carved up the backroads past sunset faster than ever on an inspiring mount with an engineered suspension. Parking the bikes seemed like some self imposed timeout for the road antics just commited, but the show was nice. The superstition mountains in the moonlight while every star in the sky was twinkling down through a few whispy clouds, like sugar tossed on a black canvas with the last strands of cotton candy as an after thought was a wasted romantic moment to the two dudes on their cruisers and inspired forms of debauchery for another night. On the way home hollywood concluded my assumptions, he would meet me back at the house, so I could put some air in the animal I was riding. He was riding the more sedate '06 Kawasaki 650r with it's tractor like exhaust note. I pulled the front wheel up at the on ramp of Idaho road and it touched down in second gear as the speedo clicked past sixty, short shifting for traffic. I steered to clean air with no cars on a nearly abandoned stretch of US 60 I twisted the grip in sixth and the digital speedo counted out ONE-EIGHT-THREE...it felt like 140 to me. The stupid stick struck again under the 101 loop where two DPS cars sat door to door as I rolled past a exactly 170. I thought at these speeds I would have tunnel vision and the earth would seprate, but I could see both very clearly. I sayed on the gas and prayed for an exit. Hollywood said they didn't even turn on the lights as he went by at 130, also seeking a quick exit. If a bullet were to land right next to your head and you could feel the splintered wood and percussion of the small explosion, the heat and deafning roar of the weapon you might know how I felt for the next thirty minutes. School is no cure for stupidity and wisdom comes from more than years, but I'm glad to have experianced this and encourage no one to follow me, including myself.(repetition is the definition of stupidity all else is a lesson)-Evan

I don't wish that we all lived under the banner of communism or hierarchy, but it would be nice to know who to kick in the balls. After my sixteen hour shift I went home to find a letter saying my license was suspended for FTA, faliure to appear. I knew I missed court because it was re-scheduled on the same day as final exams, I got the BS ticket in Febuary. I paid the ticket with the court fee and I still had to drive all the way to Lake Pleasant Justice Court and pick up the piece of paper saying I had paid and take it to the DMV. While I was at it I put the truck in my name and got a three day tag. I havn't slept in 27 hours and I have 14 more to go. Now I know what mona goes through. The truck overheated and rides like a marshmellow, so $200 bucks later it still wants more and I'm all dried up. I'm trying to quit smoking the hooka, the only flavors I have left burn like cough drops so this should be easy. I feel better.-Evan

The mustard seed, the water that drips into a crack to cause a fissure to split rock into when the cold comes. I can't quite put it into words, but I feel as if I am at the edge of a vast chasm and I havn't the words to describe the levity of an unknown epiphany. I feel excited without reason, lying in bed staring up at the ceiling as the sun blares through the curtins, I clasp my hand over my heart and feel it beating a path outward. If christmas was tommarrow I wouldn't notice and I can't describe why. It's like I find the truthful solution and lose it in the same instant, and before grief sets in the process is repeated. Digital euphoria. Maybe I fell into that chasm already and I'm excited to leave. Which would be better, knowing where you are or leaving for the unknown? I think it is strictly related to the fact that I havn't slept alot lately.