The mustard seed, the water that drips into a crack to cause a fissure to split rock into when the cold comes. I can't quite put it into words, but I feel as if I am at the edge of a vast chasm and I havn't the words to describe the levity of an unknown epiphany. I feel excited without reason, lying in bed staring up at the ceiling as the sun blares through the curtins, I clasp my hand over my heart and feel it beating a path outward. If christmas was tommarrow I wouldn't notice and I can't describe why. It's like I find the truthful solution and lose it in the same instant, and before grief sets in the process is repeated. Digital euphoria. Maybe I fell into that chasm already and I'm excited to leave. Which would be better, knowing where you are or leaving for the unknown? I think it is strictly related to the fact that I havn't slept alot lately.